Are you listening to the messages from the universe telling you it’s time to move on? Don’t make the mistake of ignoring your purpose for years. Read More...

Four years ago, I was working for the Miranda Priestly of financial services.

She didn’t disagree with you, she “violently disagreed” with you. Her colleague, my senior, confided in  me, “Your boss is difficult.” My forced grin showed I agreed.

Up until I worked for her, I enjoyed my career in finance. Over two years, it went from enjoyment to depression to desperation. When I started looking forward to weekends only to hide in bed, I knew things were bad.

My last performance review with her was Fatal Attraction meets The Twilight Zone. She was saying things that weren’t true and dismissing the truth. In a flash, I felt adrenaline take over my body and realized that I was being pushed out. Nothing I said or did would change my fate.

I was destined to either quit or be fired. I chose the former. I went into her office and resigned. The best part was when she asked what I planned to do.

“Nothing,” I said.

It was the best way give her the middle finger without giving her the middle finger.

Had I paid attention, I would’ve know it was time to quit my job 13 years earlier.

The whisper.

When I moved to Denver from Philadelphia after college, I felt I needed to look like an adult.

Appearing like an adult, to me, meant decorating and furnishing my apartment from floor to ceiling in Pottery Barn.

The reason I moved to Colorado was to snowboard. This meant I needed new snowboarding clothes and equipment. These things were expensive and I had no money for them.

I rapidly acquired over $30,000 in credit card debt. Before I knew it, I also acquired the shame and regret that often come with debt.

One day, Oprah Winfrey hosted author Gary Zukav on her show to discuss his book, The Seat of the Soul. Zukav talked about how the universe gives us messages to learn our life’s purpose. He talked about how we often experience moments or spells of struggle and in those struggles is the message.

I thought, “It’s not ironic that I’m in financial services, telling people how to manage their money and buried in $30,000 worth of debt!”

Mark Twain said, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” I decided to turn my negative situation into a positive situation by helping others with their financial mistakes. I found my purpose. I was excited.

The inside voice.

I grew up in a time and a place when it wasn’t okay to be gay. While my straight friends and peers were having their first boy-girl flings, I was stag. While my college friends felt sexually liberated, I was sexually repressed.

When I moved out on my own, started my career, and was financially independent, I made up for lost time. Part of how I acquired my debt was living the high life on evenings and weekends. I didn’t miss a single happy hour, dinner or weekend of clubbing with my new, queer community. Feeling uninhibited after a lifetime of inhibition made for an exorbitant cocktail when mixed with first paychecks.

Shortly after I found and forgot my life’s purpose, I found my life partner. When we first met, we were in puppy love and spent and lived without consequence.

A year and a half later, we went from ludus love to a combination of philia and eros love. We disclosed to each other our financial situations. We wondered why our peers were getting married, buying houses and having children while we were living in a friend’s basement apartment. We were digging ourselves deeper and deeper into a financial hole both metaphorically and physically.

Between the two of us, we had $51,000 in credit card debt. To add in irony, my partner also had a career in financial services. Like me, he was helping people manage their money when he couldn’t manage his own. To make a long story short, we created a financial plan and paid off our debt in two and a half years.

We knew it was no coincidence that we were both in financial services and made the same financial mistakes. We decided to use our personal and professional experiences to write a book to help others become and stay debt free.

We were starting to live our life’s purpose.

The outside voice.

Then life happened. We were financially liberated and moved from our basement apartment into a condo on the 12th floor of a high-rise with a view of Downtown Denver and The Rocky Mountains. We went from rarely seeing the light of day in our basement apartment to being the last people in Denver to see daylight.

Our knowledge of living debt free helped us save more and spend smarter. We strategically used credit cards to acquire hotel points and airline miles so we could travel extensively.

Our newfound happiness made us better employees and our careers moved on and up. We’d forgotten about our life’s purpose and settled into our life. We’d have sporadic stints of writing our book, but not with the fervor of people living their life’s purpose.

Writing a book is hard and we settled for easy.

The scream.

Eight years later, I was one of those people who was perpetually writing a book. By then, the universe had given me many messages and opportunities to fulfill my role in life. I didn’t listen.

The universe then assigned Cruella de Vil as my boss. I spent the next two years holding onto the familiar and seemingly safe for dear life.

Even though we had the financial resources to let me quit and even when I desperately wanted to quit, I refused. I fought for the scary because the alternative was scarier.

The listening.

It was just before my 40th birthday. I was finding happiness in planning my birthday party. I chose the perfect location. I ordered a cake from my favorite pastry shop. I invited my closest friends and family.

By then, the universe was done. When I felt that adrenaline infuse my body and I realized that I was being pushed out, in that moment I learned I had no option but to live my life’s purpose.

I went home that evening feeling calm and relieved. I couldn’t do what wasn’t doable. I talked with my husband, who knew I was depressed and masking my depression with a birthday party. We quickly agreed it was time to do what we were meant to do.

I quit my job.

The fulfilling.

Shortly thereafter we finally finished and published our book. We got serious about blogging. We turned our hobby into a business. Three years later our business is on its way to providing us the life we want to live and is helping live better lives.

If you’re trying to figure out your life’s purpose, whether you should quit your job or stay where you are, my guess is the universe already told you.

Listen before it screams.

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It’s possible to pursue a passion and earn a living, whether the two endeavors are linked or not. Read More...

Once in a while, we present Adulting.tv LIVE! Stay tuned to hear about future events, and share your questions about or suggestions for our next discussions!

Is it possible to earn money AND do what you love? Even if you’re able to figure out what your passion is, do you really believe that if you pursue your passion the money will follow? Sometimes, it’s possible, but not always the same way motivational speakers lead to you believe. Pursuing your passion is important, and possible, but earning a living may be related to your passion and it may not be.

Our guest for this episode is Stefanie O’Connell. She is the author of The Broke and Beautiful Life, and is a millennial money expert. Join her free seven-day cash confidence challenge.

Listen to just the audio by using the player below.

Hosted byHarlan Landes and Miranda Marquit
Produced byadulting.tv
Edited and mixed bySteven Flato
Music bybensound.com

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Yelling out your boss’s name while getting busy with bae? Your friends know you’ll cancel on them? Your job is taking over your life. Read More...

I know people who work 60 or 70 hours a week at a job they don’t care for, all to fund a lifestyle they don’t get to enjoy.

That’s complete bullshit.

At some point, it makes sense to take a step back and ask why you’re doing all this. It also makes sense to figure out if you really want your job to take over your life.

If you’re not happy about the way things are going, and you wish you had more time, take a look at what you do for work.

Do the following apply to you? There’s a good chance your job is taking over your life — and not in a good way:

  1. Your family begs to see you more often. Are you always gone? When little Jimmy wants you to come to the band concert and little Tiffany wishes you had seen her score a goal at her last soccer game, you know you’re missing out on your life.
  2. You talk about work ALL THE TIME. Do you find yourself talking about work things, even when you’re not at work? That one time this month you got to throw back a couple beers with friends, and you talk about WORK.
  3. You check your email “one last time” before bed. Not only that, but your “quick check” turns into 45 minutes of doing extra work because you want to “get a jump” on tomorrow.
  4. You’re worried you’ll get fired for not doing enough. Even though you’re working so much, you’re still worried about losing your job. You think that if you leave before someone else, you could be let go.
  5. Even during your breaks, you’re trying to get work done. Lunch is a time to relax and recharge for the rest of the day. If you’re working through lunch all the time, your job is taking over your life.
  6. The vacation days just keep adding upDo you have a lot of vacation days you aren’t using? Most Americans don’t use their vacation days, and if you don’t, you might be missing out.
  7. You work on your vacation days. Maybe you take your vacation days (or at least some of them), but do work in the hotel room. Your job is taking over your life when you don’t actually manage to relax because you work even during your downtime.
  8. You’ve given up some of your favorite hobbiesDid you just realize you don’t have time to play tennis with your buddy? What other hobbies have you given up? If you put off the things you enjoy because of work, that’s a sure sign your job owns you.
  9. You’re sure the big promotion will fix all your problems. Giving up nights and weekends because you’re sure if you can get a big promotion all your problems will go away? That’s a dangerous road. The promotion won’t fix it, and you’ll still be too busy to enjoy life.
  10. You’re not actually getting much done at work, but you still have to be there. There’s nothing worse than feeling like you must go in to work and clock your hours, even if it’s not very productive work.
  11. Each time you cross something off the list, the list gets longer. The never-ending to-do list can be a big sign that work is taking over your life.
  12. You think about work when you should be paying attention to other things. Is work intruding in the bedroom? I’m sure bae wants you to be thinking about the TPS report and yelling out your boss’s name while you’re getting busy.
  13. It’s hard to enjoy the weekend because you’re already worried about Monday. Does your worry about the upcoming week ruin your weekend fun? That’s assuming, of course, you aren’t just working through the weekend.
  14. Your friends stop asking you to come out because they already know the answer is no. Or they know you will just cancel at the last minute.
  15. You want to “start living” and can hardly wait for retirement. If your plan is to “start living” in 20 years when you’re done working, your job is taking over your life.

Strive for better work-life balance.

If your job is taking over your life, it’s time to strive for better work-life balance.

Figure out what really matters to you in life. If you work so much to earn money, and you don’t actually have time to enjoy it, that’s a major red flag.

We all need money to pay the bills and, you know, EAT. But at the same time, there’s so much more to life than working and surviving. If you feel like work keeps you from having nights to yourself, or weekends to enjoy fun, it might be time to look for a new job.

On top of that, it’s hard to be happy when you are stressed at the thought of losing your job. If you feel like your survival hinges on working overtime and checking your email while on vacation, there’s a very good chance that your mental and emotional health are in a fragile state. That’s a lot of stress to deal with on a regular basis.

Even if you can’t just up and get a new job, it might be time to start looking. Think about the kind of job that will allow you to live your life today — or at least allow you some time to be with the people you love — and figure out how to get that job.

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You never know what’s happening next in our changing economy. Be prepared for anything that happens with your job. Read More...

If you don’t have a Plan B, an alternative, in case your job moves overseas you’re putting yourself in a precarious position that could hurt you for years.

That’s a strong statement, but when it comes to your family’s financial and emotional security, we must be strong. Anyone who’s lost a job or been at risk of losing a job knows the toll it can take.

The risk: your job may not be safe.

With an ever-growing global economy and the increase in robotics and automation, jobs are no longer the secure and life-long guarantees from which our grandfathers benefited. Our jobs are not even as secure as what our fathers had.

As with most things in life, a backup plan helps. You have health and life insurance in case anything goes wrong.

Prospective college students apply to multiple colleges in case they’re rejected from their school of choice.

It’s for the same reason that it’s important to know what you’ll do should your job be shipped overseas.

Here’s how to start preparing yourself just in case your job moves overseas:

Build an emergency savings account.

First and foremost, have an emergency savings account. This is important not only because of the risk of losing your job, but for many other reasons.

An emergency savings account provides added cushion if you experience health issues and high insurance deductibles. If you’re a homeowner or car owner, it provides you extra protection if there’s an accident. Hot water heaters only breakdown in winters. Be prepared for that little bit of Murphy’s Law.

Open an account at a bank or credit union that has no bells or whistles. Decline debit card and check-writing features. Make it as hard to access this account as possible. This way you’ll be less inclined to access this money when a fake emergency, such as your TV going out, presents itself.

Arrange for a direct deposit from your employer or a one-way, regular electronic funds transfer (EFT) from your primary savings or checking account into this new account.

(Editor’s note from Miranda: I actually use a taxable account for my long-term savings. You can learn about my tiered strategy for emergency savings, which includes a traditional savings account and my investment account, by listening to our podcast episode on emergency funds.)

Once you save more than $400 in this account, you’ll be better than 47% of Americans.

Don’t stop at $400, though. Save three to six months’ worth of living expenses. If you’re unemployed for three to six months, you’ll appreciate this savings. If you never use it, at least you have a sense of financial security that many Americans lack.

Create a list of employers.

Create a list of employers within the distance you’re willing to drive every day. Make sure these employers offer jobs for which you qualify. This won’t guarantee you a job immediately, but it will reduce your search time. If a lot of people at your company lose their jobs at the same time, you need to know exactly where to go before everyone else starts hunting for work.

Gain more skills.

Learn one or two new skills that can be applied to your job each year. This is a good practice whether you’re at risk of losing your job or not. Learning more and more new skills will make you more and more marketable and available for upward mobility.

Many employers pay a certain amount of money each year to each employee to learn new skills. If you’re not sure if your employer offers this, contact your manager or human resource department. If you’re lucky, it’ll only cost you your time to increase your skills, your value, and your job security.

Sites such as Udemy and Coursera, offer advanced education for a fraction of the cost of college courses. This is great whether your newly-acquired education is being funded on your dime or your company’s dime.

All these courses can be taken on a computer from almost anywhere in the world.

Always be connecting (ABC).

There’s an acronym sales people use, ABC, which stands for Always Be Closing. The idea is that if you’re always closing sales, you’re making money.

This same strategy can be applied to maintaining or improving job prospects. The more people who know you and what you do for a living, the more people you help with their jobs and careers, the more people who will be your advocate if you’re in need of a job or career advancement.

Networking is an important skill to develop.

Link up to LinkedIn.

If you’re in the workforce or want to be in the workforce, you need to be on, and engaged with, LinkedIn. Ours is a virtual world and an online presence matters. Whether for your business or yourself, whether you’re employed or want to be employed, the number and value of professional connections that can be made on LinkedIn knows no comparison.

Use your company job board.

If your job moves overseas but your company doesn’t, search your current company’s job board to see what jobs are currently open or, better yet, who you know within your company that is hiring.

People like familiarity. If someone already knows or likes you and is hiring, they’re more inclined to hire you than they are a stranger. This may give you a leg up even if you’re not the most ideal candidate for the job.

Start your side-hustle.

I gush over our new gig economy because my entire business is predicated on it. I also think it’s important to have multiple streams of income, which the gig economy has made easier to achieve.

All that’s needed is a tablet, a website, or web hosting platform, and some social media accounts. Invest a few hundred dollars in recording equipment and basic editing skills learned from YouTube or other podcasts. The right person can create a successful blog or podcast themselves.

Blogs and podcasts can be monetized with affiliate marketing and sponsorships that can provide a stream or multiple streams of income.

Today’s job market is more competitive than ever, and it’s ever-changing. Many of these recommendations should be started today — before your job moves overseas. The more proactive you are, the better you’ll survive employment and unemployment.

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Crappy jobs are for teenagers. You’re above that. Actually, you’re not. You need to have at least one crappy job as an adult. Read More...

Bad jobs are the worst, but they make us better people.

At least that’s what my mom says.

When you have a crappy job as a teenager, you don’t know that it sucks. You don’t yet have the experience to know you deserve better.  When you’re young a bad job is a learning experience.

If you have a crappy job as an adult it’s a totally different story.

It’s probably safe to say we all want to wake up and go to a job that we love. We all want to make a lot of money so that we can enjoy all of life’s little luxuries.

But how many of us truly have the perfect job? 

Sometimes we end up in a job we’re good at because we have family relying on us to provide. Sometimes we stay in a job that we don’t necessarily love because the money is great. Or at least it’s enough to survive on.

What about having a job that you truly hate?

Having a crappy job as an adult isn’t the worst thing in the world.  It may not be ideal, but it’s not terrible and it can only be a temporary situation if you want it to be.

Here are four reasons every adult needs a crappy job at least once in their lifetime:

1. It’s humbling.

If you’ve been on the top and then been knocked down to the bottom, it’s humbling.  You have to struggle to work your way back up to the top.

Sometimes we take things for granted and a misstep is just life’s way of letting us know that everything we worked for can be taken away at any time.

It’s a good idea to hedge your bets and find multiple income streams through a part time job or side hustle to ensure the fall isn’t too far down — and the climb back up isn’t too high.

2. Bills still need to be paid.

How many people really do everything they want to every day?

I would like to take long walks on the beach and eat turkey sandwiches (made by a chef) all day, but that’s just not reality.

The reality for many adults is that bills are due every. single. month. You have to find a way to pay them.

Having a crappy job to make ends meet may be the way to do that for now. Suck it up. Part of being an adult is taking care of your shit through whatever means is available to you.

The good news is that it doesn’t always have to be that way. You can fix it down the road.

3. It gives you something to work toward.

If your current career situation is less than perfect, do whatever it takes to make it better.  Go back to school, learn a new skill, find a mentor, or seek career counseling.

It’s very easy to sit and complain about how terrible things are. What makes you a better person is taking action to improve your circumstance.  You will appreciate success so much more if you started from the bottom and worked towards achieving your goal.  That’s when hard work and dedication truly pay off.

4. It can be a learning experience.

Sometimes we get stuck in our own way of thinking and we can’t imagine another way of doing things.  Working at a less than perfect job, with a manager you don’t want to take orders from, and beside coworkers you don’t want to be around, can help you discover new ways to work.

Instead of spending your day hating your life, use the time to think of ideas to improve things.  It may even help you get a promotion and get away from your crappy job.

I’ve been forced to eat crow and work some less-than-stellar jobs. I mean one particular job where I prayed every single day that I would be laid off just so I could collect unemployment while looking for a better job. I know all about survival — and learning from shitty situations.

Let’s be honest, the adult thing to do sometimes is to suck it up and contribute your eight to 10 hours as a gainfully employed grown up until that app that you developed helps you strike it rich.

You might be surprised at what you learn along the way.

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“You’re fired!” Now what? Job loss isn’t fun, but it’s also not the end of the world. Here’s what you need to know. Read More...

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At some point, there’s a chance that you’ll end up facing job loss.

Whether you are laid off, or whether you are fired, this can be a very challenging time. You have to worry about your finances, figure out what’s next, and hope that your job loss doesn’t negatively impact your search for a new job.

Being fired is a more serious situation than being laid off, unfortunately. The implication is that you did something very wrong — even if you feel like you didn’t deserve to be fired.

If you are facing job loss, this episode can help you figure out how to get back on your feet.

Concepts

  • The difference between being fired and being laid off.
  • How to find out why you were fired.
  • Illegal reasons for your job loss.
  • Do you qualify for unemployment benefits?
  • Tips for handling the situation when you are fired.
  • How to review your finances in the face of a job loss.
  • Tips for reaching out to your network to find a new job.
  • How to respond when you are being discriminated against or harassed.

This week’s “do-nows” focus on what you can take care of now — ahead of a job loss. Be on the lookout for discrimination, and always have your resume updated, just in case you are suddenly fired.

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Resources

NoloIllegal reasons for firing employees
US News10 things to do after being fired
Hosted byHarlan Landes and Miranda Marquit
Produced byadulting.tv
Edited and mixed bySteve Stewart
Music bybensound.com

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Stop leeching off everyone around you, playing video games on the couch, and getting your friends to pay for drinks. Get a job. Read More...

It’s a harsh reality that life is harsh.

Life is many things, but it’s not free nor easy. From what you see on TV, it doesn’t seem like it. But I can tell you from experience that, at some point or another, most of us must buckle down and get a job.

The 2008 housing crisis and subsequent “Great Recession” hasn’t been easy on most of us. Plus, most of us don’t have the same life goals. But the gig economy has opened new doors and opportunities. Besides, it isn’t fair to leech off others.

How do you know when it’s time to grow up and get a job?

When you’re in high school and you want stuff beyond food, clothing and shelter, you should grow up and get a job.

“When I was your age,” we had to get our own job if we wanted more than three square meals, a roof over our heads, and basic clothes. Okay, that’s not entirely true. The truth, however, is that if we wanted anything extra special, such as a car, a phone (attached to a wall), or spending money, most of us had to get a job.

I may sound like an old crank, but there’s nothing like building skills and a work ethic at a young age. Plus, being financially independent relieves you of having to ask for permission to do certain things.

When you leave home, you should grow up and get a job.

For most of us, the first time we’re “on our own” is in college. College isn’t cheap these days. No longer can you put yourself through school in four years with a part-time or even full-time job. Likewise, it’s harder to put yourself or you and a partner through retirement on your own.

Don’t leech mom and dad’s life savings to have a life. Any way you can contribute helps, if only as a good faith effort.

When you’re living with mom and dad only because you need the money, you should grow up and get a job.

There are numerous reasons you might be living with your mom and dad when you’re over the age of 25. If the only reason you’re living with mom and dad after age 25 is because you don’t have a job, you need to get a job.

I’m sure you’ll say you’ve been trying. But have you? Really? Have you also tried creating your own gig in today’s tech-driven economy?

When someone else is paying your bills and you’re old enough to not get irritated when carded, you should grow up and get a job.

When you have a masters degree in being a professional student, you should grow up and get a job.

College was some of the best years of my life. Even back then, there were students on their fifth and six years of undergraduate school.

Some students can’t stop colleging. I know someone who is 40 and has been going to college since high school graduation 22 years ago. He still doesn’t have a degree, nor a full-time job.

This is not acceptable. Go to college. Get a degree. Get a job. That’s how it works. If you’ve been in college longer than a doctor and you’re not a doctor, get a job.

When you’re not working for your dreams and goals, you should grow up and get a job.

If most of your days are spent couch surfing or playing Uncharted, it’s time to get a job. It’s easy to get distracted with the easy, here and now, bright and shiny, but those don’t give us a sense of purpose or pride.

No one ever said, “I won Pokémon!” on their death bed.

When you contribute little or nothing to society, you should grow up and get a job.

We’re put on this earth to give, contribute, and help. If you’re capable and not contributing to even one other person, get a J.O.B.

When you talk big and don’t walk big, you should grow up and get a job.

If you’re over the age of 25, without a job and still “working on the band” or “going to break into show biz soon,” get a job. Don’t stop working towards your dream. Never stop that!

Just stop leeching off others to fund your dreams. They have their own dreams to fund.

When your friends have jobs and you don’t, you should grow up and get a job.

If, suddenly, you look around and have no one to play with, it’s time to get a job. Life isn’t a race, but it’s helpful to sometimes gauge your progress against your peers.

When my partner and I noticed that our peers were getting married, buying houses, and having kids, we realized our never-ending weekend partying wasn’t taking us the direction we wanted to go.

If all your peers have jobs and you don’t, they’re not your peers anymore.

If you can’t hold down a job, you should grow up and get a job… and keep it.

We all go through rough patches.

It’s hard to go straight from school to a job you like and that likes you back. Eventually, we need to keep a job. The year after I graduated college, I had five different jobs in my small hometown. I realized I’d need to move to a bigger city to find a job and salary that was satisfactory. It was scary but necessary.

If you’re constantly between jobs, it’s time to do what it takes to get a job that sticks.

This isn’t a warm and fuzzy article. It’s tough love. The better you are, the better the people around you are, and the better we all are. It’s in everyone’s best interest to for you to level up.

If we all give more value, we all become more valuable.

Now, go get a job.

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Are you having a career crisis already? That’s probably because you’re on the wrong career path. Here’s how to connect with yourself — and the career you’re meant to have. Read More...

It’s cruel problem to have today: how can an 18-year-old (or 25-year-old) decide what they want to do for the rest of their life?

Anyone who’s like people that I know in their 30s and 40s want a career path change. And it’s not uncommon for someone in their 20s to job hop.

That moment when I changed my mind about my career.

I was a C-student without any direction in high school. When I graduated, the advice was to go to college even if you didn’t know what you wanted to do. Undecided major? You’ve got two years general education to figure it out.

By my junior year in college I was a C-student in Exercise Physiology and an Honors Student in beer pong. I graduated and found a career in retail, which gave me a nice salary for 70 to 90 hours of work each week.

It wasn’t until I was 27 and found a home in financial services that I started to feel like I had a future and that I was on the right career path. Recently, I left my career in finance to grow my own business with my life and business partner. (But it’s still related to finance.)

I understand what it’s like to have to decide what you want to do with your life — only to realize later that you want to do something else. Lucky for me, what I’m doing now is a version of what I was doing before. But it was still stressful trying to decide what I wanted to do in my 20s and then leaving comfort and security in my 40s.

Having floundered to find a career and then versioning to a new one, I have thoughts on how best to choose what you want to do for the next five to 10 years of your life.

Meditate.

My first piece of advice for everything is to meditate. Yes, it’s become so common it’s almost passé. The truth is that in this crazy, over-connected, over-worked, and over-scheduled world, it’s hard to get in touch with our inner-selves. I can’t beat Miranda’s take on the benefits of meditation; I’ll just add that in addition to managing stress and relaxing, meditation gives us an opportunity to hear our inner-voice. Many of today’s most successful people credit instincts or gut-feelings for their successes.

Meditate on the idea of your career path. You might be surprised at rises to the top of your mind.

Check your feelings.

A supplement to mediation that my husband and I do most mornings is what we call “I Feelz.” We each take turns expressing three of our current feelings.

Before we agreed that I would leave my secure, retirement-funding, benefit-providing, regular paying job, I wanted to be sure that we were both 100% on board and prepared for this life change. We started this exercise then and continue it to this day.

This isn’t always as easy as it seems. We dig deep sometimes to tap into our feelings. Once our feelings are expressed, we can address them accordingly. Likewise, it keeps both our business and personal relationship transparent.

To use this exercise to choose or change your career path, take time every day express to someone else or write down emotions you’re feeling about your current state or prospective future. Be specific, rather than general. Rather than saying, “I feel good,” say “I feel good because of X.”

Use these feelings to inspire your career decisions.

Journal.

There are as many ways to journal as there are to meditate. An applicable journaling style that I practiced before I took my leap from W-2 to 1099 is like the advice of nutritionists for those who struggle to lose weight.

Keep your journal with you throughout the day. I used the Notes app on my phone. As they happen, write down the things to which you respond positively and those to which you respond negatively.

If you see a person on TV or IRL with a job or career you think you might like, write it down. As thoughts on jobs and careers come to you, activities you like and don’t like, write them in the appropriate place and designate them as positive or negative.

Over time, you’ll notice patterns. These patterns can guide you towards what you like doing and are good at doing.

Consider the career path less traveled.

Most high school students go straight to college. Most adults looking for a mid-life career change get an MBA or other advanced degree. I support these decisions for those who have considered all options, including less expensive and less time-consuming options:

  • Consider a paid-apprenticeship to earn as you learn valuable skills. This is a great way to offset education costs and increase your chances of having a job when you’ve completed your learning.
  • Consider certifications. Certifications cost a lot less than degrees and take much less time to earn. This is especially helpful if you’re flush with neither cash nor time. A friend of ours recently went from being a tax attorney to becoming a Certified Financial Planner. At about $4,200, this saved him about 12 months and $55,800 over getting an advanced degree.

Finally, if going back to school is inevitable, consider strategically taking courses at a community college. With the escalating costs of college, more employers understand the value of associate degrees and taking a few courses to enhance one’s skills.

Coupling these exercises with the standard career path seeking advice of talking with mentors, job shadowing, taking career tests, and doing informational interviews can help you get in touch with your true self.

As we all eventually learn, job titles and salaries provide temporary satisfaction. It’s fulfilling our highest purpose and being our truest selves that offer real meaning in life.

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Just because everyone’s in love with entrepreneurship right now, it doesn’t mean you need to feel bad about your real job. There’s no shame in that game. Read More...

The only way to be truly free is to start your own business and quit the 9-to-5 grind.

Have you heard that before?

It’s become a common theme in recent years. In some circles, the idea that you must become an entrepreneur with the goal of quitting your traditional job is so prevalent that there’s a patina of shame attached to having a real job.

I love working from home. I wouldn’t give it up. I haven’t had a real job in more than a decade — and wouldn’t trade a second of it. But that doesn’t mean that my path is right for everyone.

Before you decide that you need to do everything in your power to build a business that allows you to escape the rat race, stop and think about whether or not it’s really the way for you to go.

If you decide a traditional career is the right path for you, don’t let someone else shame you into quitting your real job.

What if you like your real job?

There are plenty of people who like their jobs. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Most of us just want to feel like we’re doing something meaningful and that we’re appreciated. If you have a job that lets you do that, and you like it, there’s no reason to give it up for a freelance lifestyle or the uncertainty of trying to establish a company from scratch.

Take a look at your career. Do you like what you do? If you don’t, can you retrain to do something that you like better? Do you feel like you’re moving forward? If so, there’s no shame in having that real job. Stick to it, and be proud of what you do.

The 9-to-5 lifestyle has perks.

Entrepreneurs and lifestyle business gurus might not believe it, but there are perks associated with a 9-to-5 lifestyle.

First of all, it’s hard to underestimate the joy of a great benefits package. Health insurance, when not subsidized by your employer, can be quite expensive. I know. I spent 10 years paying for my own health insurance. Now, my new employer, Student Loan Hero, offers a monthly stipend for health and wellness. It’s not quite the same thing, but it’s a total upgrade from my previous complete lack of benefits.

Plus, when you contribute to an employer’s retirement plan, there is a chance that you will end up with a match. Now that’s a perk. Free money, growing in a tax-advantaged account.

Another perk of a real job is the fact that you can clock out and leave your work at work, rather than bringing it home all the time. I know folks who just want to turn it off, enjoying family, relaxation, and friends when they get home from work. That’s harder to do when you have your own business. In fact, I have to make myself step away from the work. There are days I find myself daydreaming about a real job and what it would be like to just clock out.

Depending on your employer, you might receive other perks, like:

  • Paid time off for vacation and sick days
  • Child care stipend
  • Gym membership or discount
  • Access to company car and/or phone

Enjoying the perks of a regular job is nothing to be ashamed of. If you like it, prefer the convenience, and just like knowing what’s going on and when it’s happening, stick with the job. Don’t feel like you have to give all that up to meet someone else’s idea of what you “should” do in order to achieve financial freedom.

Understand the dark side of self-employment.

There's No Shame in Having a Real Job

Before you make your decision, make sure you consider the dark side of self-employment. I love working from home. I value the freedom and flexibility too much. But there are times that it can be stressful, and I dream of simpler times.

When you’re self-employed, everything’s on you. If you don’t work, you don’t get paid. You need to be on top of your game and work even when you don’t feel like it. There’s no calling in sick when you’re on your own.

You might also be at the mercy of a client if you are in a position where you need the money. I remember times when I put up with all sorts of shit from clients. I needed the money. Today, I don’t have that issue. But it took some time to get here. If you’re going to be self-employed, you need to be prepared to work hard and sometimes do stuff you don’t want to do.

Finances can get dicey as well. You’re in charge of your taxes, including both ends of the payroll tax. Income isn’t always the same each month, so you have to be able to plan for down months. From putting together your own benefits package to figuring your taxes, you need to be ready. Don’t forget about the overhead that comes if you get an office offsite and if you hire someone to work for you as you expand.

While there is no way I would give up my situation, there are times I struggle. Go in with your eyes open if you decide to ditch the real job and join those of us in our alternate reality.

Don’t let anyone tell you they have the ONE solution.

There’s nothing wrong with being self-employed and ditching the world of traditional employment. However, there’s also nothing wrong with sticking with your real job if it works well for your situation and lifestyle. As long as you are careful to plan for the future and save up, a real job can be one way to ensure that you meet your needs.

Figure out what works best for you, whether you just want a side gig for a little extra cash while maintaining your day job, or whether you hope to eventually move on from the daily grind.

But don’t make your decision based on feelings of shame that you aren’t doing what you’re “supposed” to do.

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Entrepreneurship is the new Big Thing. But is it really your ticket to financial freedom and living the good life? Read More...

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It seems like everywhere you look, someone is touting the value of entrepreneurship as the key to long-term financial independence.

Thanks to technology and the popularity of a number of books and websites, it’s possible that you think that you’re ready to be the next Zuckerberg.

But is that a realistic expectation? Are you really cut out to be an entrepreneur?

And is entrepreneurship all that it’s cracked up to be?

Concepts

  • How much money do small businesses actually make?
  • Is entrepreneurship right for everyone?
  • What traits make a good entrepreneur?
  • What is entrepreneurship, anyway?
  • The reality of trying to squeeze a side hustle into your life.
  • Who is a good candidate for starting a business?
  • Brief intro to the Meyers-Briggs test, and what it says about the ideal entrepreneur.
  • How to get started if you are serious about starting a business.
  • Tips for creating your business, a little bit at a time.

Listen for our “do-nows” for specific actions you can take to get started with a new business today. We’ll also answer a listener question about how to budget when you have the irregular income of an entrepreneur.

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Resources

BloombergSmall businesses don’t make that much money
EntrepreneurTraits of entrepreneurs
Hosted byHarlan Landes and Miranda Marquit
Produced byadulting.tv
Edited and mixed bySteve Stewart
Music bybensound.com

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